About Yourself

I think that information requests like "About Yourself" are far too ambiguous to satisfactorily answer. Do you want to know how old I am (16), what school I go to/have gone to (currently homeschooled), what my hair color is (brown), where I live (the United States), where I work (I don't have a job, and I hope you will let me test your software regardless), or what browser I use (it changes periodically, but currently Mozilla Firefox)? I suggest that you ask more specific questions such as, "Where do you live?" or "What color is your hair?". Perhaps, and this may be a preferable option, you could not ask people about themselves, since I hardly see what that has to do with testing software (though if I'm missing the point you may feel free to enlighten me). Or perhaps nobody reads these "About Yourself" sections anyway, which makes me wonder even more why they would be required. In any case, I do hope that you have a wonderful day and that sitting in a cubicle/office all day is not sapping the life out of you. Perhaps you could take your family (if you have one) to the zoo or beach, or you could sit under a tree on a sunny day and read a book. Perhaps you could even talk to God (if you're so inclined, although I know He'd love to chat and is always ready to listen). In any case, do have a good day, and please give my regards to everyone at your place of employment!
-Travis

Spam

Yes, Yunfei Ebql, I'd love to read your email about "Hideous surgery's victims".
Yes, Wilford B., I'd love a complimentary diabetic meter.
Yes, myself, I'd like to hear about the job you (I) found me.
Yes, Julie whom I do not know and who apparently does not know my name, I'd love to meet tonight. Why don't we go to Cancun; I just won several free trips to there.
Yes, myself, I'd love to get 72% off on a bunch of drugs I don't use.
Yes, Live Jewelery Auctions, I'd love to buy 1 carat diamong rings (live ones, I suppose?) at up to 95% off.
Yes, I'm very grateful to know that the Nintendo Wii that I didn't order is here.
Yes, I'd love to hear about the legitimate online company that needs workers in my area (however you found out where my area was).
Yes, I'd love to confirm the plane ticket I didn't buy.
Yes, M. Vincent, since I haven't replied to my email about finding myself a new job, why don't you tell me about the job that you found me?
Yes, German person, I'd love to hear about something to do with liability insurance that I had to translate to understand what you were talking about.
Yes, I'd love to hear what legal advice you have for my bankruptcy problem.

Now, why on earth are these important emails in my spam folder? :\

Happy New Year!

Or... am I a bit late for that? Oh, well. I'm in East Tennessee now! :D I like the mountains and such. And even though our cabin doesn't have WiFi, I can steal internet from the conference center here. Guess where I am now!

On a side note: some elephants can read everything that can otherwise do either.

Christmas Letter 2008

December 2008

Dear Friends and Family,

Merry Christmas!

This year was all right. A few things happened, but approximately 241 days of the year were simply blank spots on the space-time continuum. The other 125 days, however, were filled with fun, excitement, and undergraduate studies.

Linda (Travis's sister) is 21 and has moved to a classified location to continue her studies and become an underground music appreciating superhero. Superheroine? Whatever. Anyway, her goal is to save the world from villainous musicians. She’s already captured a rogue violinist as part of her training.

Travis (me) is now 16. He (I) is (am) making great progress on his time machine invention, but he needs an automatic quantum field oscillator. Also, he thought he won the Nobel Cake Prize, but then found out there wasn’t one.

Mom and Dad escaped, but our search party found them in Florida and immediately returned them. They have trained our chickens to lick envelopes and are now running a profitable pre-sealed envelope business.

Our rock farm was doing well, but in June the rocks started getting scarce, so we moved to an active volcano where rocks grow more quickly. It’s very exciting living right next to a lava flow, and it’s very convenient when you need to cook something. We have had three straw huts burn down already, and it looks like this one is about to catch fire right as I type, so I need to print this letter before the lava completely engulfs the printer.

Be sure to write me (Travis) soon!

TTYL,

Travis (And Mom, Dad, and Linda too I guess)

News!

First of all, I've changed the template, as you can tell. I hope you like it, because it took ten minutes to fix everything after I installed it. Let me know what you think!

Also, I got an A in my English class. :D

It's almost Christmas, and I haven't posted my annual Christmas letter! I'll do that later. :P

-Me